Really Mr. Staal? Good Job.

Apparently Jordan Staal will not be able to play until well into the 2010-2011 season. The dickbag.

Marc Staal is still the best one no matter what everyone tells us.

Waaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!

-&-

The Oilers placed a couple of players on waivers, Sheldon Souray and Martin Gerber were among them.

Link.

-&-

The Ducks put even more players on waivers. Henrik is angry at Brett Festerling for leaving her and the Anaheim Ducks.

How dare he?

-&-

James Duthie is the best person on TSN, ever. He's amazing and hilarious.

This is an article about Gary Roberts and his training regimen that could kill a small ox. But young players love it.

Here's a tiny excerpt of the article:
Some needed to get leaner. Some needed to add muscle mass. Some, like Hodgson, needed to get over injuries.

They were all in for a summer they will not soon forget.

I'll spare you the details of the workout regimen, because I lost seven pounds, pulled an oblique muscle, and threw up just trying to type it. Roberts drives the players as hard as he drove himself.

-&-

You Know It's Preseason When...

- Jack Johnson scores two goals and has an assist.

- Carey Price wins a game.

- Brian Gionta is a captain.

- Nazem Kadri scores a big goal.

- Olli Jokinen means something to the Flames.


Any other suggestions for this? We could think of more but we're going on vacation soon so...

Waivers And Injuries

Here's the waiver list for this part of preseason:

The following players were place on waivers on Wednesday:

DET - Jamie Johnson
TAM - Niklas Persson
TAM - Marc Pouliot
CLB - Trevor Frischmon
CLB - Jonathan Sigalet
PIT - Chris Conner
PIT - John Curry
PIT - Corey Potter
PIT - Steve Wagner
PIT - Tim Wallace
PIT - Brett Sterling

The following players cleared waivers on Wednesday:

WAS - Keith Aucoin
WAS - Andrew Joudrey
MTL - Mathieu Carle
NJ - Alexander Korolyuk

Here's the link for the list as well.

-&-

Michael Leighton has been injured! He bulged a disc in his back and will be out for some time.

And Kyle Okposo has injured his shoulder and will have to have surgery. Well, there goes our prediction that they would win the Cup.

-&-

Carey Price finally won.

Finally!

We were excited. Noodles cannot be swayed from putting him on her fantasy team. We don't know why she does this to herself.

News And Notes For This September Day

NHL.com has a comprehensive list of their sleeper picks for the upcoming 2010-2011 season.

Here it is: link.

We like it but ours is waaaaaaaaay better, seriously.

-&-

We found a new blog called The Hockey Campaign.

Here's a little excerpt about the blog and the writer for the blog:
To briefly introduce myself- I’m a senior marketing student and an avid hockey fan. What better way to combine my two interests than talking about the marketing efforts of the NHL to promote my favorite game. And analyze. And complain. (That’s why people get blogs, right?)

We can't wait to see where this goes this season. It sounds like something right up our alley.

-&-

Captain Shea Weber is already lighting it up, bitches.

Nashville's going places, we're calling it. And we don't mean moving.

-&-

Brian Burke said that time is running out for Nazem Kadri to make the big boys. And Kadri was like "STFU old man, I know what the fuck I'm doing."

Article, haha.

-&-

Top Fifteen: Rookies Who Could Make It, Finally

The Top Fifteen Rookies Who Could Make It, Finally


15. Jonathan Bernier

14. John Carlson

13. Kyle Beach

12. Tyler Ennis

11. Brayden Schenn

10. Tyler Seguin

09. Jamie McBain

08. P.K. Subban

07. Cory Schneider

06. Eric Tangradi

05. Taylor Hall

04. Jordan Eberle

03. Mikael Backlund

02. Nazem Kadri

01. Kyle Turris


And here is TSN's list....pretty close to ours.


Who do you think will make the big boys? Opinions? Suggestions? Bueller, Bueller, anyone?

Yeah, We're Cheating

- Watch this and try not to get creeped out.

- Yes, he is that type of guy


- I want to auto-tune my life


- the internet is also for hockey....and porn


- Eric Tangradi: beast


And postgame

Double Date: Chicago Blackhawks Defensemen

On our first edition of Double Date, you have a decision to make: door #1 or door #2. We will highlight a date with each handsome fellow and you have to decide which one you would want to date.

So here goes, which one would you date?


Door #1

Who: Duncan Keith


Date: you get to help him polish his mini-Norris Trophy (and no, that is not a thinly-veiled euphemism) while drinking a bottle of wine as he makes lasagna from scratch.


OR


Door #2

Who: Brent Seabrook


Date: you get to walk his adorable puppy with him while eating ice cream and talking about the latest video games.


So, what's your decision: Keith or Seabrook?

Boy, You've Left Me Speechless

This link was sent to us by Amanda and our peepers were greeted by this gorgeous specimen of a man:


Our face after that picture:


Let's see it again:


WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO US?! STOP IMPREGNATING ME WITH YOUR OH SO SERIOUS FACE

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-&-

Okay, onto more serious bizness.

- Carey Price told Habs fans to chill out. How funny is that? Seriously, Habs fans may want his head on a platter but we love him. He just doesn't give a shit. But if he was our goaltender we would be hating on him too.

- Apparently Nick Boynton threatened to "slash" Blair Jones's throat with a gesture in the game last night. He has been suspended for one regular season game.

- And Peter Mueller is out with another concussion. Douchenozzle.

- Magnus Paajarvi: amazing


- Courtesy of Shanny, here is a link to Puck Daddy with more information about the Pens/Caps Winter Classic and the HBO documentary that is being filmed before and during the game. And here's another link about the whole idea. It sounds like we're going to have nothing but that to watch during Christmas.

Cue The Emo Carey Price Pictures

The Boston Bruins burned Carey Price for 601 goals tonight. This is what happened after the 457th goal.

We really like the fire and emotion that Carey shows after a goal is let in. Shows us that he cares.

There's already a state of emergency called for the Canadiens and it's only preseason. Oooooh nooooooes.

And in the other Canadian teams front...

The Toronto Maple Leafs turned a new leaf and beat the Senators after losing to them the night before.

Leafs' hero for the night: Phil Kessel. We know, we were surprised as well. Who knew the kid could play hockey? Could have fooled us, sir.

Then later, the Oilers beat the Canucks without most of their good players in the lineup.

Jordan Eberle was there to make up for it.

But it's only preseason so don't get your panties in a bunch. It's just make believe until the first day of the real season.

Tidbits And Juicy Morsels

We figured that tonight would be a good time to clean out the old Gmail inbox but we came up with surprisingly little except these two gems...


A couple of days ago, Donna sent us this email...
Real Men Wear Pink

For the last 2 years, every Plymouth Whalers' player has dyed his hair pink for the annual Pink Out game to promote Breast Cancer awareness (Last year Tyler Seguin looked fierce in his pink mohawk). They wear special pink jerseys that get auctioned off after the game. All money raised goes toward finding a cure for breast cancer. They will be doing it again this season (the game is Oct 16th) but this year there is a little twist. The coaches have agreed that if $10,000 is raised before the game, they will dye their hair pink along with the players. If you'd like to find out more, including how to donate, go to:
http://www.plymouthwhalers.com/page/pink-out-campaign

Then she sent along this picture aka photographic evidence


If you live in or near Plymouth we suggest that you participate. Sounds like their events are the shiznit.


And if that picture didn't get us riled up enough, Hayley sent us a YouTube video of the Niklas Hjalmarsson song


heaven help us

Preseason Is Here

Tomorrow is the first preseason game of the 2010-2011 season. Finally.

- We attended both days of the Penguins training camps that were open to the public. It was amazing and worth waking up at 8 am and being there 'til one thirty in the afternoon.

Eric Tangradi is becoming a big deal.

And want to know what it's like to be Robert Bortuzzo? Here's your chance.

- The New York Rangers Chris Drury broke his finger and will be out for 4 weeks because of the injury.

- Ray Shero was signed to a 5-year extension. Yayz! Daddy Shero will be with us (and the Penguins) forever.

- Also signing an extension was Steve Mason with the Columbus Blue Jackets. He celebrated by buying a 24-count of Timbits.

- Mark Letestu: ready to break out


- Is anyone else excited about a blue line pairing of Drew Doughty and Willie Mitchell? Noodles won't stop talking about the possibilities.

- Adam Proteau goes over the four most important and pressing questions of the 2010-2011 season. Article.

- And apparently Mikail Grabovski is being sued for punching a guy in the face for wearing a Habs jersey in Vancouver. Or something like that.

- DAVE BOLLAND?! WHERE DID YOU GET THAT HAIR?!

Injuries Happening Already

Filiip Kuba of the Ottawa Senators injured himself while at training camp. He will now be out 5 to 6 weeks with a broken leg.

As if that isn't ridiculous enough, Blue Jackets' defenseman Kris Russell sprained his knee and will be out for 2 to 4 weeks with the injury.

And now Marc Savard will be out because of symptoms stemming from the concussion he suffered in March. No one in Boston is happy about that.

Onto happier things, GM Stan Bowman is trying to find a European team to take Cristobal Huet off of his team. Oh wait, that isn't too happy...oops.

Well, the Blue Jackets named Ken Hitchcock to their special advisor branch of the organization. That's some good news, unless you're Nikita Filatov.

And lastly Ilya Kovalchuk, everyone's favorite primadonna Russian, has been moved from left to right wing so that he could play on a line with Zach Parise and Travis Zajac. Go big or go home must be the Devils' mantra.

-&-

So it seems that the revamped Mancrush of the Week went over well. Or maybe it seemed that way because we chose to feature the ever-dependable Marc Staal. Anyway, we are pleased that nearly every voter approved of the new-sih feature.

Now we have Silver Fox: Win A Date With An Oldster for you to take in and vote on. We hope that you like that as well.

Silver Fox: Win A Date With An Oldster #1

The inaugural post for Silver Fox: Win A Date With An Oldster will be on Mario Lemieux. We figured that this was the easiest player to win people over with.

Who doesn't love Mario Lemieux, male or female?


-&-



Name
Mario Lemieux


Current Position
owner of the Pittsburgh Penguins and professional badass



Former Position
center for Pittsburgh Penguins



Why He's Amazing
because he scored a bazillion points and winning awards and Stanley Cups while battling cancer


Why He's (Still) Sexy As Hell



What You Would Do On A Date
considering that Mario owns a third of the city of Pittsburgh, he would take you on a drive in a convertible through the city at night. The weather is beautiful and he stops on one of the many, many bridges to watch the fireworks from PNC Park because he's Mario Lemieux and he can park his car anywhere he wants.

It's So Close We Can Smell It

So training camps opened today.

WHO ELSE IS INCURABLY EXCITED FOR THIS?!?!?!

JON HAMM IS EXCITED!


We've been so deprived that even this face made us excited.

Yeah, that's sad.

We just can't get over it. We're going to be in attendance tomorrow for the Penguins open training camp. And Sunday even if it is overkill.

Here's the "training camp outlook" for the Penguins this season. It's still exciting.

It seems like it's been FOREVER. And there are pictures already.


Okay, onto the news front:

Cody Almond was the breakout performer during the Traverse City Tournament. The Minnesota Wild babies kicked the pants off of everyone.

Here's a recap of the tournament.

A bunch of NHL veterans were invited to training camps on tryout basis...here's a list of them.

The Dallas Stars signed James Neal and Matt Niskanen to extensions.

Apparently Patrick O'Sullivan will be signing a two-year deal with the Carolina Hurricanes. Interesting...

Toni Lydman has double vision? And no one knows why he's got it? We think this is a case for House.

Not Again

Okay, so we changed our minds.

Marc Staal is our favorite Staal, it's official.

He didn't decide to miss the beginning of the season, Marc signed a contract like a good boy. And he didn't get an infection in his foot after surgery. What was Jordan doing? Running barefoot in the sod farm? How dare he?! He knows we need him.

No, stop trying to butter us up. We're still angry at you.

Okay, maybe we can forgive you closer to the season...


But doesn't this situation sound familiar in a way? From two seasons ago, a certain defenseman decided that foot surgery was the best option for himself. And look where that got him...


We're just saying but we're not saying.


In other less pressing news:

- It seems that Brian Gionta will be named the captain of the Montreal Canadiens. Okay, whatever.

- Joel Quenneville was re-signed to an extension. That's what happens when you win the Cup.

Speaking Of The Other Staal...

Marc Staal was finally, finally re-signed by the New York Rangers. Maybe John Tortorella will let his best defenseman attend training camp now.

Why the Staalboy is the (second) best Staal...

He agreed to stay with the roller coaster Rangers for five-years at 3.975 million a year.

Noodles has already purchased her Marc Staal #18 jersey. We couldn't get the computer fast enough to stop her.


And we found evidence of the NHLers at the Vanity Fair partay.

Look at them schmoozing, who do they think they are?

Oh Make Me Pretty, Vanity Fair

Doll me up.


The NHL's Media Pretty Petty Party Tour is underway. Or something like that.

This article is all about the fashion happening at the Media Tour. We know that Henrik Lundqvist smuggled Sean Avery in his suitcase to the event.


And then Drew Doughty got caught in an Usher video.

Who else could help him fluff his hair like that?

-&-

Other News & Notes

- Eric Belanger was signed by the Phoenix Coyotes. Smart move, Maloney.

- The Anaheim Ducks finally re-signed Bobby Ryan. We all were getting a little worried.

- The 2011 All-Star Game was gifted to the Ottawa Senators. Boo, we wanted it.

- And we found this link from Google about the Traverse City Tournament.

Roberto Don't Want It

Reports out of Vancouver is that after a serious bizness meeting with the brass of the Vancouver Canucks, Roberto Luongo gave up his captaincy.

We're a little surprised but after about five seconds we started yelling at each other over who should get it next.

And we've pretty much come to a consensus that the captaincy should be given to Ryan Kesler.

He's a leader, that much we know. And only one person wouldn't agree and his name is Andrew Ladd.


- The Philadelphia Flyers offered Bill Guerin a shot at their training camp. Oh wonderful, of course they did.

- Niclas Bergfors was re-signed by the Atlanta Thrashers to a one-year deal.

- The consequences for the Ilya Kovalchuk debacle of 2010 were kind of steep. But no one messes with Old Gary B.

- Prospects are playing everywhere...Penticton is housing the Flames, Oilers, Canucks, Sharks and Ducks...then there's the Maple Leafs, Blackhawks, Penguins and Senators are all playing each other.

- And the Habs should be naming their captain soon but for now it's all secretz and liez.

- Sheldon Souray is not allowed to attend the Edmonton Oilers training camp. So says Mr. Tambellini.

No One Delivered Our Tickets

Oh poo, another year where we didn't get a special delivery from a Pittsburgh Penguin. Another year of disappointments. Well, here's a video of the lucky few.


Most visits were awkward, the others were just funny. We love this time of year.

Home Run? We Could Have Guessed It

We know you've seen it but we figured that not posting it would be worse than people thinking that we never saw it.



We think the film was doctored.

Trick Shot!

Thanks to Shanny again, she sent us a fantastic video about Jonny and Patty being all catty and one-upy.


- It looks like Ruslan fedotenko could be a New York Ranger. He was invited to their training camp.

- The Thrashers will use Dustin Byfuglien as a defenseman. Interesting choice, Thrashers coaches.

- The Colorado Avalanche re-signed Peter Mueller.

- The Edmonton Oilers re-signed Andrew Cogliano to a one-year deal. Yeah, they don't want him after this season.

- The Phoenix Coyotes re-signed Martin Hanzal to a two-year deal. Yeah, they kinda want him.

Bother, Bother, Bother, The News Is Back

More players were signed:

- Nigel Dawes is now a Thrasher. Is it us or is Atlanta the hot place to be now? SO many players are there now.

- Ryan Potulny was signed by the Chicago Blackhawks. It's a two-way deal in case they don't like him that much.

- The Detroit Red Wings signed Kirk Maltby again. We don't know why they do this to themselves (we kid, we kid).

- Richard Park signed with a team in Switzerland which means we don't have to be worried about him scoring a goal on the Penguins when he's one of three penalty-killers.

- Finally, the Nashville Prdators re-signed Cody Franson. He's got the big-boy money now.


This is a tab bit late but since the virus we've been backlogged with all kinds of stuff. Shanny sent us an email about Bobby Ryan and his twitter revealing that he attended the Emmy's a week or so ago.

According to his twitter Bobby Ryan (@b_ryan9) attended the emmy awards last night. Someone called him "silver." He replied with this fucking fantastic tweet:
Just want everyone to know when you see me and call me silver, it's the first time I've heard the joke and it's hillarious. Thanks!

I wish I could find a picture of him on the red carpet or something but, no such luck so far.

Love it.


The poll is up to vote on whether Mancrush of the Week should be kept for the season. It's all up to you guys...NO PRESSURE AT ALL. Just kidding...not really.

Mancrush Of The Week: Marc Staal

Marc Staal


Why He's A Mancrush:

Because he's the Staal boy, as we like to call the middle, less thought about Staal. He's the brother that's forgotten about because he's always the good one. Or at least that's what we think about Marc.

Marc is a defenseman who is always in the right place at the right time. He rarely gets riled up and hardly ever makes a mistake. He's the perfect Staal.



Maybe Marc can improve on his skillz this season by scoring a few more goals but we aren't asking for much. We just love him as a defensive defenseman. We know that Wade Redden needs him.

NHL 11: Captain Serious vs The Mullet

As if Patrick Kane needed any more reasons to be the cocky sonofabitch that he is...


As you know, Patrick Kane was the cover boy for Ea Sports 2010 edition and this season Jonathan Toews is. They played each other for bragging rights.

And as if we weren't excited enough for NHL11, we had to see this commercial like fifty times on Monday.

Labor Day Plans

It's been a slow summer for everyone. We've been waiting for that big news to drop but the juiciest piece of gossip we got was the whole Kovalchuk escapades in New Jersey. And that wasn't even really interesting.

We've been brainstorming some new ideas for the blog and came up with a few new features that we will be test-driving in the coming month. If it takes off then we will do it during the season.


First off, Mancrush of the Week could be coming back. It's up to you guys. We don't think it was given a fair shake being that it was debuted in the summer and all. But there will be a poll up on Wednesday so that you can vote on if you want Mancrush of the Week or not.


Next up is the new feature called Silver Fox: Win A Date With An Oldster. That will take place on Saturdays.

Basically it's like Date Night Friday for players who are old/retired/GMs/hockey anything as long as their either retired or over the age of 40. We will feature a little bio on them and then a very brief outline of what/where you would go on the date.


Another new feature we've been tossing around is Double Date. DD will be done on Fridays, like Date Night Friday.

We will take two players who have something in common, either siblings or teammates or former teammates or both have blue eyes. Whatever we deem similar. And we're going to do a little bio with a special fact about them. Then it's up to you to choose who you would date. It's like a choose your own ending but Date Night style.


And lastly, the other new feature that we've been debating over starting is Sunday's Undisclosed Desires. (yes we stole that from the Muse song, let's hope they don't try to sue us)

This feature will rely heavily on reader participation. What we want is for you guys to send us emails, anonymously or not, that detail a player/team/desire that you have never admitted to. Think of it as hockey therapy or Post Secret for hockey. You can send us your deepest secrets and we will post them on Sunday. We will even post some of ours.

Of course this depends on if you want to do this feature or not.


Awards Monday will of course be back. We love that feature and will do it as long as this blog is in existence.


How this will work is that we will have a practice post starting Wednesday/Mancrush of the Week and then a poll will follow that will be up until the next week. And you can decide whether you want the new feature to stay or not.

So please, email us with suggestions or comments or whatever. You're the reason we do this (besides the fact that we love blogging about hockey) so yeah, we can't wait to hear from everyone.

Top Ten: Things NHL-ers Are Doing This Summer

Top Ten Things (a few) NHL-ers Are Doing This Summer


10. golfing


09. getting arrested


08. training


07. celebrate with the Stanley Cup


06. attend sports events


05. getting married


04. do captain-y things for their teams


03. party on the Jersey shore


02. hang out in groups and act ridiculous


01. walking around all shirtless and lazy

Saturday's All Right For News

- The Dallas Stars have offered Jonathan Cheechoo a try-out at their camp. He accepted the invitation to the ball.

- Fredrik Modin signed with the Atlanta Thrashers. Oh good, cause we were getting a little worried that he wasn't going anywhere.

- BJ Crombeen and Ty Conklin participated in riding tandem bikes to open the Tour De Unite in St. Louis. It's an event to raise money for three separate charities.

- Jaroslav Halak had a final autograph signing in Montreal.

- Nice face, Mr. Cammalleri

Let The Rain Fall Down

Yes that is right kiddos, the Pittsburgh Penguins have signed Mike Comrie. After months of speculation over whether he would sign somewhere it seems that he has found the right home.

And maybe he can contribute on a team that looks like it's going to be a roller coaster year. We have our hopes and dreams.

What we're most excited about is having Hilary Duff in our city. Seriously? Hilary Duff will be living somewhere in and around our city which makes us want to jump up and down and scream, "LIZZIE MCGUIRE WE LOVE YOU!" What? We grew up on that television show, forgive us.

Now we can make relevant Mike Duff comments and post pictures of them traipsing around town.

This is just the tip of the iceburg.

We Knew It All Along

We can hear the funeral music coming from LeTude's room.

The San Jose Sharks signed Antti Niemi to a one-year 2 million dollar contract. It's not surprising but it's still a little bit of a slap in the face.

It took a while but it happened.


Speaking of signings, Chris Stewart and the Colorado Avalanche agreed on a two-year six million dollar deal. Good for him.


And, and, and Carey Price was finally signed by the Montreal Canadiens. He agreed on a 2-year 5.5 million dollar contract. Yayz!


We already knew that Jordan Staal was going to miss some time but now it's official. He will miss the start of training camp.


(And that's all we have for now. The main computer we use for the blog was gifted with a bad-ass virus so it has been a couple of days of back-logged information. we apologize for anything that's old, new, misspelled or generally crappy. Enjoy your day.)

Whose Team Are You On?

- The Sabres re-signed Matt Ellis to a contract. Woooo for them.

- The new captain for the Islanders will be......Doug Weight. Somewhere Bob Errey is silently crying from joy.

- The Toronto Maple Leafs kept Christian Hanson by re-signing him to a one-year contract.

- The never-ending career of Chris Chelios came to an end when he finally retired....oh wait, it's not over yet...he is now a part of the Red Wings front office.

- Rookies getting pictures taken for their rookie cards. Yayz!

- Nikolai Khabibulin was sentenced to 30 days in jail for being drunk and driving a motor vehicle in Arizona.

- We were sent this video by Shanny and Van:

Whose team are you on?! It's a hard question, seriously. DON'T MAKE ME PICK!!! Oh, okay, duh Jonny!

Probably seen it already but it's still worth the second viewing.