Columbus Blue Jackets
Hot damn, this team. There are so many times in a season that we just feel so bad for this team and their fans. Because despite what people who think they're funny say, the Blue Jackets have fans. In the same way that the Thrashers had fans.
They exist but they're few and far between. Especially after the crappy season after crappy season that they have to endure from this team.
Their luck is so bad that they were the worst team in the league and still couldn't pull out the number one seed. And then they picked a d-man, which we still think is questionable at best. At least Murray will be a stud (if they don't destroy his soul). Whether that's with the Blue Jackets or not remains to be seen.
Also, captain Rick Nash is finally gone. It was turning into the 2012 version of the Mats Sundin saga. In his place is Brandon Dubinsky and Artem Anisimov and picks and a skate sharpener and whatever else Sather decided to just throw at the Blue Jackets to get Nash on the Rangers.
Sometimes we think that the Blue Jackets are the hot mess of the league. On the ice at least. They're always failing and losing and the players never look very happy. Just ask Jeff Carter how much he liked living in Ohio.
Will the Blue Jackets make some noise this season? Will they make it to the playoffs? Probably not. We're sorry fans.
The thing that sucks is that the Blue Jackets do not lack talent. They have young kids like Ryan Johansen and John Moore and Ryan Murray who are really good. And Ryan Murray who they drafted in June will definitely be a good defenseman. But will the youngins be pushed into too big of a role too soon? And will that destroy their soul and suddenly you're looking at the second coming of Kris Beech? Those are the questions that keep us up at night.
And it's a real shame because the Blue Jackets could be something. If they had the right general manger and the right scouting system and on and on.
General Manager - Scott Howson
Coach - Todd Richards
Team Captain - no one
Player(s) everyone should love - Jack Johnson, duh
Player we don’t love - RJ Umberger because of reasons related to the fact that he was once a Flyer
Who they got - Dubinsky, Anisimov, Nick Foligno, Sergei Bobrovsky
Who they lost - Rick Nash
Located at - Nationwide Arena
Hotness level - 4
So, here's how it breaks down:
1 point for Jared Boll's eyebrows because come on, they're awesome and 2 points for Derick Brassard's face and minus 1 point for his receding hairline and 2 points for Jack Johnson and 1 point for Ryan Johansen's ears but minus 2 points for Nick Foligno's everything and then 1 point for John Moore becoming a studly-mcstudmuffin in the future so that equals 4.
Pretty sure our math is correct.