That's just unheard in our line of work.
We feel that we have let down our general female population/readers and we want to apologize. It might be because we never liked the obvious pick but even this is too much for us.
Anyway, enjoy the date!
-&-
Helloooooooo ladies.
I don't think I need to introduce myself but just in case, my name is Staal, Jordan Staal.
And I am the son of a sod-farmer with extremely buff arms and beautiful blonde hair. It happens only in Canada. I am the best looking Staal but my brothers aren't too bad.
Okay, onto the date.
I have planned the perfect evening for us. It starts out in the afternoon when I take you to get my favorite food ever, pierogies. I like to smother them in butter and onions but don't tell coach.
After that indulgence, I take you to my favorite place in all of Pittsburgh: the zoo.
We start with the tigers and pandas and work our way throughout, aw-ing at the cutest animals and making fun of the crazy-looking ones.
I buy you a stuffed polar bear because I saw you looking at it and hand it to you as we leave the park.
I have to admit, it's a pretty suave move on my part.
In the car, we listen to the radio and sing along all the way to your house.
-&-
Did you like this innocent date with Mr. third Staal?
Are pierogies and the zoo your type of date?
Let us know either by voting or in the comments section.
14 comments:
You made up for the brain fart.
He has this habit of scrunching up his mouth just a bit when he's listening to people talk. The most devastating facial tic ever.
Yes to this date. Fer sher TK approves, as well: "Date my linemate, dude. He's super polite in public and has a huge wiener!"
Jordan Staal is my youngest and naughtiest imaginary NHL boyfriend. His crooked smile KILLS me.
This look is like putting up the freaking Bat signal in the sky for chicks. Seriously.
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_w8a6bIv6CMs/ShHrcCzkfSI/AAAAAAAADfQ/t_VBLjY8Pms/s1600-h/staal,+jordan+close+up.jpg
He is one of the slices of bread in my All Staal sandwich. Yep...it's in my One A Day.
For the date? Ditch the stuffed animal. And any date with Jordan Staal will involve spankings. I know this in my heart.
@Esbee: SPANKINGS?
Who are you?
Ummm... I am Esbee. What do you mean who am I?
yes please! @mouthguard you know TK would some how show up on the date!
@Esbee - It takes balls to admit you're into spanks (giving, receiving, watching). Therefore, you are awesome.
Now I gotcha Mouthguard. There is just something about ol' Jordy there that says "I have a very firm palm that would like to make contact with your ass."
To answer your questions:
Did you like this innocent date with Mr. third Staal?
I fur sher did.
Are pierogies and the zoo your type of date?
I’m a vegetarian so, no to the pierogies but a BIG yes to the zoo.
Absolute YES to this date. I would go on ANY date with Jordan Staal.
I'd like to show my appreciation of his crooked smile and facial tic by sitting on his face...
I came less to comment on the date and more to comment hey Esbee--you are pretty damn awesome.
However, the best spankings are the ones administered, not received. We deal in tops here at Hockey Junkies--meaning these boys are all delicious delectable bottoms. With an occasional foray into other scenes.
Would I go on this date? Yeah. He's adorbs and it's a cute innocent date. Would he get a late night call saying I had a bad dream about him getting devoured by a tiger and he should rush over right away to comfort me? Absolutely. Would he find me waiting at my door with too much eyeliner and a pair of leather straps. Most definitely.
Alright Jennifer! Notice my original comment says "any date with Jordan Staal will involve spankings." So much left unsaid...I know there has to be an amazing ass under those baggy hockey pants.
I hereby declare thee Jordan Staal, The Patron Saint of Spanking.
I'll just be over here.
Jordan's quite cool but Eric's better... I want a date with Eric! :D
Oh Mary you will enjoy my Canes one-day-then! :-)
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