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Door #1
Who: David Backes
Date: this date involves visiting the Saint Charles Humane Society, where it is obvious that he is there frequently and him regaling you with stories of how he punched Corey Perry in the mouth once and how he is a Silver-medal winning Olympian.
OR
Door #2
Who: TJ Oshie
Date: this date involves playing NHL11 with Patrik Berglund, eating pasta and chicken at their favorite Italian restaurant down the street then hanging out at their apartment and playing with their new dog.
Which St. Louis Blue would you like to hang out with and go on a date?
As always, it's up to you.
8 comments:
TJ Oshie ALL THE WAY!
David Backes, although if he started bragging about being a silver medalist I might have laugh in his face and make it clear that I'm a HUGE Team Canada supporter.
Can't I just have Cam Janssen instead of these two?
Backes! TJ's a bit too baby faced for my liking.
St. Louis native Jon Hamm (a/k/a Don Draper from Mad Men) is a rabid Blues fan.
He does commercials professing his undying love and loyalty for the Blues.
He is also the most luscious man alive.
Can I just have him? I mean, if he loves and pimps the team he's an honorary member of the team too, agree? Yeah?
I adore Backes and Oshie, but unfortunately I get the sense that if I unleashed my nekkid beaver on them they would shriek and turn instantly clammy and catatonic, completely incapable of doing anything that would come utterly naturally to a fully grown, normal hairy mayun's mayun. I'm not suggesting they're both wimplemans. Not by a longshot. Just a bit -- in need of kid gloves, still. Enfantin, c'est ca.
Mouthguard--that is how I feel about a lot of these boys, both hockey and coworkers (long story). But you need to realize that they will continue to be attracted to us for the very reason that we represent something unknown, untamed, wild and grownup and REAL. The little Trixie Puckbunnies will giggle when told of their exploits in the faceoff circle. We will lean into their face and holler '62 percent??? What the FUCKKKKK is 62 percent??? My dead alcoholic grandmother could win 62 percent!!!!".
We are the Danger. It's our duty--neigh, our BIRTHRIGHT--to usher these youngsters into the hard, sexy reality of life.
Since the Blues are enemies, it's with great reluctance that I pick Backes--I hope our pillow talk could consist of giggling while speculating how much TJ and Jonny cuddled and cried in their North Dakota holding cell that night they got busted in college.
St Louis gets the otherwordly Jon Hamm.
Philly gets the stupendously dirty David Boreanz.
Chicago gets...bloated Vince Vaughn.
I DEMAND A RECOUNT!!!
Hurray! Thanks for taking Inglorious Backes under advisement, girls :) Tall, bright blue eyes, saving puppies, and punching Corey Perry in the face... excuse me, I'm feeling a little dizzy and need to go lie down.
TJ Oshie's got the skillz, but that baby face is a killer. Can't believe he's just a couple years younger than me. But, if he comes with a side of Patrk Perglund, I guess I could sweat it out...
I'm beginning to think the Blues might have the best-looking bench in the NHL (and therefore, all of sports.) More research is needed. Will have to do some in-depth analysis.
Backes, hands down.
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