This is one of those posts. This comes from ChunkySids, possibly one of the top seven best pen names ever.
-&-
Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow
Many things in the NHL are constantly changing with each game; lines, save percentages, availability of players, amount of teeth and sometimes even the coaching staff. One thing that does not change is the appearance of our beloved men on ice, or so we thought. Though the 2010-11 season is still a new born screaming with excitement and $100 million healthy scratches, an interesting trend has started to occur; hockey player’s hair is becoming a center of attention. This is important especially because it controls the aerodynamics of the game and not because we want to dip one player’s head in oil and rub it all over our bodies or latch onto another’s because of the luxurious flow. Let’s take a look at some of our league leaders…
Henrik Lundqvist – New York Rangers
My Lord, have you ever seen hair like this?! It’s perfectly coiffed and that wave is just delightful. He should have his own styling commercial.
Patrick Sharp – Chicago Blackhawks
Speaking of styling commercial, why hasn’t someone given one to Patrick Sharp?
Olli Jokinen – Calgary Flames
Bald is perfection for him. Could you imagine this man with hair? I picture a massive tuft of fiery red hair explosion but that could just be due to his team’s name…
Drew Miller – Detroit Red Wings
Sometimes a touch of grey is all you need to be a fox even if you are 26.
Taylor Pyatt – Phoenix Coyotes
The hair is perfect and does not move; he is the Pauly D of the NHL plus he comes with permanent guyliner.
Transformations:
Scott Hartnell – Philadelphia Flyers
Old…
New!
The full moon curse has finally ended.
Niklas Hjalmarsson – Chicago Blackhawks
Old and sexy
New and sexy
Hair or no hair, you are still a true Swede shot-blocking machine.
Playoff Edition:
Patrick Kane – Chicago Blackhawks
If you cannot grow a playoff beard, cut into that curly blonde thicket!
Dishonorable Mentions:
Adam Burish – Dallas Stars
What is going on in this picture? He looks like he just finished a class at the Flashdance Academy.
Nicklas Backstrom – Washington Capitals
This can be fixed but the fact that he has neglected his mop for so long makes me ill.
Dion Phaneuf – Toronto Maple Leafs
Personally, I like him as a player but this small hair sprout is identical to the plants you pick up in Mario games.
Eric Boulton – Atlanta Thrashers
The hair on his head is not so bad but I am very concerned that his beard was inspired by a feminine landing strip…
T.J. Oshie – St. Louis Blues
Not only is he not Asian as his last name suggests but he is challenging Justin Bieber in the 15-year-old boy with out-of-control hair category.
The Project:
With some help from Rogaine and his friends, Ryan Getzlaf of the Anaheim Ducks can flourish with beauty once again.
Writer’s Pick:
Dave Bolland – Chicago Blackhawks
It’s feathered, it’s thick, and it’s BEAUTIFUL.
9 comments:
I was with you until you got to Patrick Kane. The only man who ever looked good in a mullet was P. Swayze.
Haha this has to be one of my all time favs. I was surprised I didn't see some off the "Letang sex hair" but I think the rest was amazing!
GodDAMN Irish men and their gorgeous hair. Bolland indeed takes top prize. You won't notice his stutter because of all the sexy he has going on everywhere else. Darlin' - talk to me with your hair, sweetheart. There you go!
And Drew Miller. Where to begin? I TOLD YA those Miller brothers are trouble personified. One of my ex-boyfriends was of the Irish persuasion and had prematurely gray hair. He was also an ANIMAL. Everywhere. All the time. And it suited him just fine.
I could never quite put my finger on what it was about Bolly I found so hot until a friend pointed out how he looks like a mean stoner. Yep, that's the ticket!!
Getzlaf looks great!! Too bad those other photos survive...and Burr looks like he's on his way to the Renaissance Fair. "I say, good sir, prithee thee to ye old crease to cause conflict with the tender of goal?"
And I'm on record as being a diehard fan of all things Swede, Backstrom really looks like a female PE teacher. Hammer and Henrik, as always, show us how it's done.
I should clarify--Bolland looking like a skulking hesher is a good thing. A VERY good thing.
Carry on.
"I say, good sir, prithee thee to ye old crease to cause conflict with the tender of goal?" LOLLOLLOL!!!!
And his MOM drove him to the Faire, and picked him up afterward. She also helped him with his chainmail.
Yeah Bolly = Potsmoker, Much? Euuuhhhh... ;)
Re: Backstrom. Not sure if a new 'do will erase the fact that he looks like Baby Spice. He has a baby girlie man face.
Re: Getzlaf. Agree that he looks much better without random tufts of hair missing from his forehead region. But you know the guys give him major shit over the Rogaine/plugs. Have we definitively decided that he owes his new hair to Rogaine or plugs? Rogaine hair usually has the consistency of old man pubes - it's fine and hard to comb. One of my old bosses went this route with disastrous results, but anyway... Whereas plug hair is generally more lush and 'zazzy - think Brian Engblom or Wayne Gretzky. Poll, please!
Ha! And I thought that I was the only one who was sure that Oshie was a Japanese name. I kept insisting he might be part-Asian until photo evidence proved otherwise.
As for Eric Boulton, yes that is a little disturbing, but perhaps it matches his girlfriend's in a kind of velcro way.
Wait a minute...Getzlaf HAS hair...Hartnell does NOT....
oh jebus!! I loved this post!! I agree with EHisCDN... surprised not to see Letang... otherwise great choices!!!
Post a Comment