Being that we have Brian Burke in our presence every day, we hold the Maple Leafs in a special place in our hearts. They're like the Cher in our lives, the dumb blondes who are just so darn sweet that we can't hate them.
The ever-talkative Dion Phaneuf was named captain and we think it was a wise choice.
The Leafs have young forwards, Nazem "Oh, you want him? Can't have him" Kadri, a pretty decent defense and spiffy new uniforms that will be the talk of the NHL.
Then Mr. Burke acquired Kris Versteeg and Bill Sweatt from Chicago for three players who were marginally important.
But he wasn't done.
Mr. Burke broke every Penguins Colby Armstrong fan by signing him to a deal that pulled him out of Hotlanta.
It was almost as good as Rick Dudley getting all those former Hawks players for bupkiss. Almost.
Don't be surprised when we become closet-Leafs fans.
And it's only because of Brian Burke's hair and Luke Schenn's lips.
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General Manager - Brian "the man" Burke
Coach - Ron Wilson
Team Captain - Dion Phaneuf, we were going to say him as a joke then we realized that he really was the captain :o
Player(s) everyone should love - Kris 'Verbeauty' Versteeg, like duh
Player we don’t love - Phil Kessel because he's streaky
Who they got - Colby Armstrong, Kris Versteeg, Jerry D'Amigo, Mike Zigomanis, Joey Crabb, Danny Richmond, Brett Lebda, Mike Brown, Marcel Mueller
(Leafs' fans do have a pretty good sense of humor)
Who they lost - Mike Van Ryn (injury), Viktor Stalberg, Phillippe Paradis, Rickard Wallin, Wayne Primeau, Garnet Exelby, Jamie Lundmark
Located at - Air Canada Centre
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Hotness level (on a scale of 1 to 10) - 5
We were scared because of all the backlash lately over the hotness level but we stuck with our guns and gave the Leafs a 5. Why? Because Luke Schenn, Mike Komisarek (who might play this season), Kris Versteeg, Nazem Kadri and Carl Gunnarsson. That's why.
6 comments:
Didn't Bill Sweatt end up signing with Vancouver?
I would include Mike Zigomanis in the hotness factor tallying as well, which would bump it up to a 6!
Leaf fans have to have a good sense of humour. I'm just sayin'
MelTing beat me to it, but it's the only way we survive!
I'm really happy with a the signings that Burke made (we stole some of my favourite players from my other favourite teams i.e. the Penguins and the Hawks).
I'm actually excited to watch some games this year!
I do not like Dion Phaneuf as Captian though, which I argue about with my fellow Leafs friends from time to time. They all love the decision meanwhile I don't think he's mature enough and he doesn't have the temper suited to the job. Then again I might be wrong, and I hope I am.
"We were scared because of all the backlash lately over the hotness level but we stuck with our guns and gave the Leafs a 5."
?????? Nonsense! Stop it.
First, you guys are NEVER SCARED. Of anything. Ever. That's why you're so awesome.
Next - what's all this about a "hotness backlash"? ;) Whatever could you be talking about? I think most people have been generally jiggy with your hotness ASSessments. Except for Montreal (too generous - beyond nothot), Vancouver (ditto - guest post, but still - you guys published the nothotness so you have to represent), San Jose (don't EVEN get me started on the nothot debacle that is SJ), the CapiTOOLS (overpaid nothots to the core - so gross). Conversely, Dallas, Atlanta, LA and St. Louis shoulda all scored 8.5's or higher, man. Those hotties were robbed! For shame.
As for the Leafs, I am very excited to see what they can pull out of their asses this season. Brian Burke deserves a 10 for hotness for all sorts of heartfelt reasons. He's technically a hot mess of an old fart, of course, but his character and personality push his hotness factor through the roof. And Verbeauty ain't called Verbeauty for nothing, so... He's proof that as sexy as brains can be, ultimately it's a-okay and hot for a dude to be stupider than my jokes - so stupid, in fact, that you want to put a paper bag over his head so you can do your business with him without distraction. Am I right or am I... stupid hot?
As a Bruins fan I am conditioned to hate the Leafs. Though many of us thought it a good joke when we got them to take Kessel in a trade. A joke that got even better when we picked up Tyler Seguin at the draft this year. Still, I know the Leafs aren't to be ignored, esp now that, for the first time in their history they have real personality (see Versteeg). So it should be an interesting season.
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