Awards Monday: Week Nine

Hottie Of The Week



Sidney Crosby



Bitch is on fire.

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Best Commercial Of The Night



A&E new show, Steven Seagal: Lawman



We can't believe that it's real either.

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The Ryan Malone Wheaties Award



Mark Eaton



As the only Penguins defenseman who hasn't been injured or out of the lineup this season, he is starting to look like a haggard old woman. But at least he's here and working so hard to do the little things to get the win.

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FAIL



New York Rangers defense



They let opposing teams score fourteen goals against them in two games. And that's not even counting the game they played tonight against the Penguins.

How Convenient, It Was Free Hat Night

Another hat trick for Sidney Crosby?

Really? Does he think that we'll just love him again if he keeps scoring at will like this?



Well...it kinda worked.

We can't find the hit that Matt Cooke laid on Artem Anisimov on the interwebs to post here. We were at the game so what we saw was just the aftermath.

EDIT: Thanks to Evgeniya for finding the link.


What is your opinion if you've seen the hit?

And now Matt Cooke has been suspended for two games.

What do you think about that? We don't like it at all. It's all part of that double-standard in the NHL.

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And we're super late on this but the Chicago Blackhawks scored three shorthanded goals in a row in their game against the San Jose Sharks on Wednesday night.


A hat trick of shorties.

What Would You Be At The Circus?

Tells you a lot about their personalities...

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The injuries just keep piling up for every team...

- Martin Havlat is out (again) for the Wild with a hamstring injury. Brent Burns has joined him on the IR.

- The Devils lost David Clarkson to a lower leg fracture. Nasty.

- Milan Lucic is out with the dreaded HAS or high ankle sprain.

- The worst injury news was Ales Hemsky. He was hit from behind by Handzus in a game against Los Angeles and injured his shoulder. He has to have shoulder surgery soon and will miss the remainder of the season.

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Happier news...Torrey Mitchell should be playing with the San Jose Sharks soon. Article. Henrik couldn't be happier about this.

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The Islanders held a Baby Crawl during their game against the Pittsburgh Penguins yesterday.

Such a weird thing to do during an intermission.

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The Hawks pick who they would and wouldn't want to cook them a Thanksgiving dinner.

Date Night Friday: James Neal

Name
James Neal


Nicknames
Yimmy, James Fuckin' Neal


Number
18


Team
Dallas Stars


Age/DOB
22 / September 3, 1987


Birthplace
Whitby, ON



Interests
Working out with Gary Roberts, being Derek Dorsetts's mortal enemy and scoring all the time


Random Fact
seems to accidentally play dirty....if that's possible



What Happens On The Date
James picks you up in his black Escalade and jsut beeps for you to come out. He just smiles and says, "Do you like home cooking?" You shrug, "Uh sure, yeah." Then he peels out from your driveway. There is some talk radio show on with some Top 20 music playing in between but he turns it down to make small talk. The two of you are deep in conversation when he pulls the Escalade into a driveway. The house in front of you is palatial. As you're gaping, he says "It's not mine." Then the two of you walk up the steps and he just walks into the house without knocking.

He calls out, "Mike, Willa, we're here!" He leads you into the kitchen and the smell of spices and bread cooking waft to your nose and you're already hungry. In the huge kitchen, Willa and Mike are slaving over the oven and the stove. They smile at you and then James, then usher the two of you to the kitchen table as they bring plate after plate into the room. Willa sings in the center of the room as you eat and Mike looks on lovingly.

When you're stuffed, James leads you into the living room and he holds up a bunch of DVDs, "You can pick what we watch?"


Was It A Satisfactory Date?

What movie do you pick to watch with James? Did you have fun eating Willa and Mike's food? Would you go on another date with him?

Happy Turkey Day (For Americans)

All we're doing today is stuffing our faces and watching some games. Hopefully everyone else is doing the same. We love this holiday.

8+7=15

Shaun Majumder, wow, you sir are a true comedy genius.

Guess That Hair #6

Last week's Guess That Hair was in fact John Tavares. Which everyone knew.

Should we make these harder? Are the pictures too easy? Just wondering...

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Hints:

1. Part of the 2003 draft that makes Pierre McGuire drool

2. Hates Sidney Crosby

3. Parties hard


This should be another easy one...

Awards Monday: Week Eight

Hottie Of The Week



David Perron



After not scoring for the first week or two of the season, he has come roaring back ro get goal after goal and hat tricks in like every game. Winner.

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Best Commercial Of The Night



San Jose Sharks



Hahahahahaha.

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The Ryan Malone Wheaties Award



Patrice Bergeron



Show us a game that he hasn't gotten the game-winner this week and we'll say that you photoshopped it. He is such a winner it's disgusting.

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FAIL



FSN

It just fails at life every game.

No More Juice Boy

Everyone knows about the Juice Boy, the player who loses the shootout has to serve players Gatorade and water after practice as punishment, but what the Penguins do is a little different.

Article.

The losers of the shootout were Ben Lovejoy and Eric Godard. Ben was stoned so he had to do a new punishment for losing.

He had to put on shoes, walk up the arena steps to the upper concourse and touch the "Y" in the giant "BankAtlantic Welcomes You to the BankAtlantic Center."

"I had to touch the 'Y' and I was successful," Lovejoy said. "It was pretty easy getting up there. I found a freight elevator. I got lucky. That was the only way. All the doors were locked so I had to go to the top level.

"Getting down was a bit trickier. I almost ended up outside the building but I was able to get through. There were a bunch of doors. I was banging on some doors but no one let me in. I found an open door and feel like I did a whole lap around the concourse, but I made it."






Proof.

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If you haven't seen this, it's pretty awesome. We wonder what this says about society that people will flip out and fight each other for a stick. That isn't even signed.


We don't know where that girl in the front row came from but she's intense. What a game to go to.

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Hello ladies.

This Is When We Wish We Were Poor

So the Penguins could buy us coats. Is that sad?

Date Night Friday: Josh Bailey

Name
Josh Bailey


Nicknames
Bails, Joshy-face, that cute kid on the Islanders who isn't John Tavares


Number
12



Team
New York Islanders


Age/DOB
20 / October 2, 1989



Birthplace
Bowmanville, ON


Interests
Guitar Hero, playing with children for charity and being cute with children



Random Fact
Scored his first NHL goal against the Phoenix Coyotes January 2, 2009


What Happens On The Date
Josh has you meet him outside of a pizza place by Nassau Coliseum and you're dressed in some nice jeans and a pretty shirt. Then he shows up all wet from a shower in some plaid shirt and grabs you in a big hug.

He opens the door for you and waves you in with a, "Ladies first." You order a plain cheese pizza and then pick a table by the window. After the first couple of minutes of small talk, the pizza comes. Then you start people-watching out the window. He helps you make fun of the people walking by and it turns out that he's pretty funny. When the pizza is all gone, Josh insists on paying (in a showy yet cute manner) and then walks you to your car.

He doesn't leave even as you get into the car and just blushes. Then he says, "Would you like to go out again?"


Was It A Satisfactory Date?

Would you say yes to another date with Josh Bailey? Did you have fun on this one?

Like we always say, it's up to you.

Help Is On The Way

.....Hopefully.

Top Ten: Divas In The NHL

Top Ten Divas In The NHL

We picked the top ten players in the league who exhibit behaviors that we see in Hollywood stereotypes like Mariah Carey and Jennifer Lopez. These behaviors are demainding more money, acting all high and mighty and peacocking.


10. Phil Kessel


He's just the baby-Diva of the bunch. When the rumors started that he wanted just as much money as David Krejci even when he had a considerable drop-off in points and was injured, we knew that he was a Diva in the making.


09. Mats Sundin


Remember last summer? We do. We still think it was funny but that's because we aren't Leafs fans.


08. Henrik/Daniel Sedin


Swedish twins, primadonnas. They demand to be on the same team together at the draft then years later, demand to stay on the same team together for matching contracts.


07. Henrik Lundqvist


Look at that picture and tell us that he isn't a Diva. He shows up on Page Six wearing a scarf just to go to the grocery store. And he has a different suit every day.


06. Marian Gaborik


He was supposed to have demanded $10 million a year from the Wild to sign with them. But instead signed with the Rangers for way less. And we know that he loves living in New York, just look at those pants.


05. Teemu Selanne


There is a story about Selanne that still haunts us to this day. According to Selanne, women in Finland loved him so much that they would steal his chicken bones when he was done with them just to have a piece.


04. Martin Brodeur


All wife/sister-in-law jokes aside, he really is a Diva. He flops around like he has been shot and acts like he never had a part in the whole fiasco with Sean Avery. We know the truth.


03. Dany Heatley


Why not? He demanded a trade after he realized that the Senators weren't going to get any better any time soon. Then he didn't like the team that he was supposed to go to and nixed that trade. Sigh, Diva.


02. Marian Hossa


If he could flip his hair, he would. We liken his Diva-ness to Tyra Banks because he's all about himself and only does things if they are beneficial to him.


01. Sean Avery


The Queen of the Divas. But what makes Avery so awesome at being a Diva is that he owns up to it, he knows that he's a Diva and he embraces it with his Calvin Klein-clad arms. And that's what makes Sean Avery the number one Diva.

Where Did He Get Moves Like That?

From the Kings/Panthers game. Jack Johnson ends it in the shootout with those moves. Who does he think he is? Sidney Crosby?

Awards Monday: Week Seven

Hottie Of The Week



Ryan Miller



LeTude convinced us to pick him because of his amazing week where he won every game he played and now leads the league in all categories for goaltenders except number of shutouts. Amazing.

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Best Commercial Of The Night



AT&T



The end is what makes us laugh so hard.

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The Ryan Malone Wheaties Award



Grandpa Guerin



For not missing the net when we needed him the most.

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FAIL



Columbus Blue Jackets for one game



They somehow got their asses handed to them Caroline-style by the Detroit Red Wings. We feel sorry for Columbus because they never saw it coming.