Penguins 4 - Blue Jackets 1
This recap is being done in letters, just because we feel like being twelve-year-old fangirls again.
Dear Marc-Andre Fleury,
That toe save...how do you have any groin left? We're girls and we couldn't even do that. And thank you for holding down the fort when your defense decided to go out for a smoke.
Dear Captain Awesomeness,
Your passes never cease to amaze us and we've been seeing them for what, four years now? You are an insanely talented and awesome man and we can only hope that you'll just get better.
Dear I Evgeni Malkin, I like eggs,
Scoring leader? Thank you for taking the team on your back and giving them the hope to win. We bet you pulled out the Miracle speech or maybe the Braveheart one.
Dear Kris Letang,
What the mother's ass? Two goals? Are you trying to kill us? Every man over the age of 39 was crying tears of joy when you scored that second goal. You're their savior.
Dear Mr. Scary Orpik,
Was there a single Blue Jacket that you didn't absolutely demolish? We think you even went after Wade Dublieiczwiczs (sp). How can you even move in the morning? You almost had more hits than the entire Columbus team. Nice.
Dear Ryan Whitney (the cake-eating love of Noodles's life),
Everyone hates you. But Noodles still loves you (for some insane reason). And that hit you had on Jakub Voracek was awesome. We knew you had it in you.
We wish that you would score a goal in every game because the way you act when you do makes us wish that we could see that face every second of our waking lives. It's surprised and happy and excited just to score. We love it.
You are a machine. Great f-ing game. And nice potty mouth when Wade Dublieieswic made a save on your shorthanded chance.
Hello Bill Thomas,
Can you be out there for every face-off? Or maybe be a Zigomanis Jr.? That would be totally awesome with us.
Dear Halbert and Dumper Bob,
Way to be awesome on the PK. And we love the two of you together, in a non-sexual and completely platonic way.
Dear Everyone Else,
What a f-ing win.